Adults, as a rule, observe the rules of decency when communicating with others. They try to restrain themselves, not to be rude, not to raise their voice, even if they don’t like the interlocutor. So why do many parents think that calling their children names, insulting them, scolding them for far-fetched reasons is normal? Is it really impossible to just talk, try to understand, and not put your authority on a little person for whom mom and dad are the closest people?
Insults to parents. Photo: shkolazhizni.ru
Peculiarities
You can often hear that it is impossible to offend modern children - they themselves will offend anyone. Of course, such situations are not uncommon, and we will talk about them later.
And yet children, especially young ones, are constantly subjected to insults. Often a child is not able to fight back, this is due to his mental immaturity in comparison with an adult.
Concept and legal characteristics
In the Russian Criminal Code, certain actions against minors are a qualifying criterion. However, in principle, there is no special article specifically on inflicting insults.
Moreover, even the previously common Article 130 of the Criminal Code, dedicated to insults, has already lost force. Therefore, you will have to be guided by the Administrative Code, Article 5.61.
In accordance with this article, the essence of insult is the humiliation of the dignity and honor of the injured child or teenager. At the same time, the actions of the offender must be expressed in an indecent form, that is, not comply with accepted social norms and etiquette.
- Sociologists believe that comparing a person with an animal or object can be considered offensive in the generally accepted sense.
- It can also include unpleasant, offensive touching of the body or clothing, especially if the latter exposes the body.
- This also includes rudeness, swearing, and obscene language.
Composition of the crime and qualifying characteristics
Considering that punishment for insult is provided for by the Code of Administrative Offences, we will talk about the elements of the offense. Let's look at the main points:
- the object of the offense in our case (narrower than that provided for in Article 5.61) is the honor and dignity, peace of mind and balance of a child or adolescent;
- the subject can be recognized as a person who is sane and over sixteen years of age (if the culprit is younger, the parents are responsible for him);
- the objective side consists of humiliating actions (words, gestures);
- direct intent, that is, awareness of one’s actions and the desire for them - this is the subjective side.
Article 5.61 has three parts.
- The first is devoted to insult without any qualifying features.
- The second is about a public offense. If we talk about insulting minors, the first example that comes to mind is the actions of a teacher in the classroom.
- The third part of the article is intended to punish for allowing insults in a certain work that is shown publicly or in the media. In this case, we can talk about a special subject of the offense, since the activities of the same printed publications are controlled by a rather small circle of people.
Here you can give an example from a newspaper article from the times of the USSR. The journalist wrote about the school and described one boy with the words “a big-tongued fat man.” The boy was teased for a long time after that. In our time, such a publication could easily become a reason for filing a complaint or legal action.
Standards of articles for insulting a minor child
In addition to Article 5.61 of the Administrative Code, it is worth remembering the Constitution of our country (Article 21). Russia has ratified the International Convention on the Rights of the Child. However, these documents contain only requirements, guarantees, and not potential penalties for violation.
We will talk further about what types of insult to minors exist.
Echoes of Soviet education
Svetlana:
“In our family, it was not customary to discuss children’s problems. Something went wrong, I immediately heard curses addressed to me. I remember when I was still little and didn’t understand why my mother called me “a piece of rubbish.” I pestered my mother with questions: “What is rubbish? Why am I a piece, because I am a whole person?” Then I angered my mother even more with my questions. By the way, she called me names over a completely trivial matter. It seems I accidentally spilled water or compote on the floor.”
In Soviet times, it was not customary to turn to psychologists, and there was no Internet yet so parents could read useful articles about raising children. Moms and dads regularly called younger family members names in their hearts, and didn’t even think about how this could affect the child’s psyche. Moreover, such communication occurred in normal families, where the parents were not alcoholics, went to work, took their children to kindergarten and school.
“Beast”, “freak”, “moron”, “rubbish” - children heard such curses every day from their beloved parents, most often, for no reason.
Adults believed that they gave enough to their children: they fed them, clothed them, bought them toys. Therefore, a curse spoken in the hearts is not scary at all.
But in our time, modern parents know how to raise a child so that he grows up to be a harmonious, happy person. Why do some mothers and fathers still practice insults against children?
Parents abuse children. Photo mel.fm
Types of insult
Now let's look at a few common practical situations. When and how can a child or teenager be insulted?
Another child
This situation seems trivial to many: well, children fight, then they will make up. However, it is precisely from supposedly innocent teasing that cases of bullying of children and teenagers in children's groups sometimes arise. And the consequences can be not only psychological trauma, but also physical injury, and even child/teen suicide.
If the offender is a child or teenager who is under sixteen, then adults - parents, guardians, and other legal representatives - are responsible for him. Punishment of the child himself (meaning official, provided for by law) is not allowed.
The following video will tell you how teenagers are tried for insult in other countries of the world:
School employee
Is it possible and how to punish a teacher for insulting a child? This type of insult can be called a modern problem in Russia. In this regard, the situation in some schools, as well as kindergartens, is not far from the bad traditions of the times of the USSR.
If the offender is a teacher, you can protect your child in several ways. In this regard, personal calm, lack of aggression and consistency are important. Necessary:
- Talk to the offender himself. It is possible that the active and clear position of parents will immediately discourage addiction to anti-pedagogical methods.
- Complain orally or in writing to the head of the educational institution.
- The next step is to call or visit your local Department of Education office.
- Finally, you can contact the police, prosecutor's office or court.
In any case, one cannot be unfounded. One way of proving this could be a psychologist’s conclusion that the child is being subjected to unwanted influences from the teacher. Modern experts are able to “get” such facts out of even small children.
The section on punishment will tell you more about ways to influence unscrupulous adults.
For adults
Insults of this kind happen all the time and everywhere. There are two categories here.
- Children who appear somewhere without their elders may become victims of the rudeness of strangers. In public transport, in shops, in school halls, just on the street, something similar happens every now and then.
- In addition, a huge number of children suffer from abuse from their own parents and other relatives. Many people either have very little teaching experience or are guided by dubious ideas or untested recommendations. As a result, children's disobedience, mistakes and simply the bad mood of adults often turn into insults for minors.
Are you being tried for insulting a minor? Let's find out!
What to do?
Considering that there is Article 5.61, we can give the expected answer: it is necessary to demand that the offender be brought to administrative responsibility. However, practice shows that in the case of minors there are a lot of subtleties in this issue.
Even an adult needs witnesses or an audio recording to prove an offense. What should a child do who rarely has a voice recorder with a high-quality recording function? Or a very small child who can only say that the teacher has offended him?
Parents must protect their children. Insult is a deep psycho-emotional trauma with certain consequences. Attentive loved ones must certainly pay attention to changes in behavior and be able to understand the reasons.
- Systematic insults carried out by teachers are especially dangerous. Regular bullying is the cause of various complexes, the development of chronic diseases, and many problems even after growing up.
- Even worse are the insults that come from relatives. They usually begin at an early age and continue for many years.
That is why the first thing is to raise your children with full awareness of their own responsibility. This allows you to solve three problems at once:
- ensure the child’s full development;
- promptly identify external problems, including insults from teachers, peers, and the like;
- take care of a future in which the child will grow into a responsible person who does not allow himself to offend others.
It is also important to warn the child about possible meetings with ill-mannered people - in transport or just on the streets. Here it is necessary to talk about the inadmissibility of conflicts, to teach them not to react to attacks from outsiders, and if danger arises, to take appropriate measures.
A child/teenager can himself complain about the insult. Typically, such requests are accepted by helplines or psychological help.
We will talk about liability for insulting minors below.
You need to start with yourself
Parents need to analyze in a calm environment why they take it out on their child. Most likely, the reason will be the stress that adults experience every day. After all, when everything is fine with them, mom and dad don’t quarrel, don’t shout, don’t call them names. But as soon as problems arise, for example, at work, parents immediately begin to behave inappropriately.
Inappropriate parents. Photo by osvitanova
Adults need to learn to relax and react differently to the opinions of others. By the way, often mothers and fathers become kind and sweet when their child gets sick with something. Fear for the baby's health prevails over the fear of appearing to be bad parents in the eyes of society.
Parents need to learn to talk calmly, listen to the child, and try to understand him. Look at your son or daughter through the prism of your own love, and not through the eyes of a teacher, grandmother, or neighbor. It is very painful to hear curses from a loved one, even if the child understands that they were said in the hearts. Parents, first of all, must love the child and accept him for who he is. This is not your property, he is an independent person, albeit small. But you need to respect him as a person, and under no circumstances insult him.
Angelina:
“I grew up in an amazing family, where everyone respected each other, helped, and cared. We had a family tradition. On weekends we gathered at a round table, drank tea and read some interesting book. I especially loved when my grandmother read, she was great at transforming into characters. But at the university I found a friend, and one day she invited me to visit. For me, this visit became an unforgettable lesson in how not to behave in a family. Mom and dad talked to each other in raised tones, not shy in their expressions. But it was my friend’s younger brother who suffered the most. As soon as they called him names, I never even heard many words. Moreover, my presence did not bother anyone; apparently, for them this was the norm. Then I asked my friend how one could live in such an atmosphere. She said that since childhood, her parents would call her “stupid” or “beast.” They don’t have any close relationships now; the friend is waiting for the moment to leave home and never see her parents again. I feel very sorry for her, I often invite her to visit us, where respect always reigns and love lives.”
Punishment and responsibility
Modern laws regard insult as an offence. Therefore, the responsibility will be administrative.
In all cases, the punishment is a fine, its size ranges from one thousand to five hundred thousand rubles. It all depends on who exactly insulted the child/teenager - a citizen, an official or a legal entity. How exactly a specific offender will be punished is determined only by the court.
The protection of children's rights in Russia is a developing phenomenon. A huge number of people in our country still have to take many different actions in this area.
